Two

teodor_reljic

Photo used with permission.

What is your full name?

Teodor Reljic.

If you had to lie about your age, how old would you be?

I’m in my prime. Ask me a couple of years from now.

Satan or Cthulhu?

Against my (better? worse?) literary inclinations, I have to go for Satan. The reason is simple as it is universal: better conversation.

Charles Darwin or Mark Zuckerberg?

Darwin. Because that Paul Bettany biopic made him seem interesting.

Which film would you remake?

Drawing a blank on a film, sorry. But transforming the final season of Mad Men into a feminist revenge-horror epic ala Soska Sisters would make me very happy indeed.

Andrew Lloyd Webber is writing a musical about your life. What’s it called?

‘I HATE THAT THIS IS HAPPENING’ because I would hate for that to be happening.

If you could, which book would you write out of existence?

Any book which suggests that books should be written out of existence.

So why should we buy Two?

Because I went for broke while writing it – there is no easy irony or shortcuts. You’ll either like it or get to watch me crash and burn. Either way it’s worth your €12, right?

By the way, what’s the colour of your favourite pillowcase?

Black-and-orange. Most importantly, emblazoned with a little-known trademark logo which says STAR WARS.

—–

Read an extract from Two

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Two is published by Merlin Publishers

(Teodor also blogs on Soft Disturbances)

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